Check out students' answers to Flo-Joe's CAE Writing tasks with a teacher's feedback
Question
An international youth organisation is planning to publish a report looking at attitudes between different generations:
We are very keen to hear how elderly people are regarded by younger people in different countries and why the younger generation feel the way they do about elderly people. Suggestions regarding how positive attitudes can be developed are welcome. |
Write the report for the organisation. (Between 220-260 words)
Read Uti's answer to this question below. Try correcting the piece of writing yourself first: use the marking codes to think about what might be wrong (or what's good) about the piece of work. Then when you're ready, click the green buttons in the text for our feedback.
Introduction This report is intended to look more closely into how the youngest of our generations in the Eastern part of Germany views WF What is live WF I got WW Not surprisingly the children's personal experiences differ greatly. Rather unusual is that PE Generally, the toddlers WW Conclusion To further improve the relations between these generations and give those who do not have grandparents the chance to get first-hand experience, I could envisage the following. Firstly, invite pensioners from the old people's home and grandparents to read stories to the kids on a regular basis. Once they know each other better I could even picture a joint little WW I strongly believe these measures would be mutually beneficial and are bound to improve relations substantially. |
Content
The task was completed fully and appropriately. You have outlined attitudes and also suggested ways in which positive attitudes can be further developed.
Communicative Achievement
Ideas are communicated clearly and the report is written in an authentic style, in general using a neutral register but with the occasional use of more informal language suitable for the target audience. The reader would be fully informed and the report would be well-received.
Organisation
The report is very well organised. Paragraphs and section headings are clear and cohesive devices are used effectively.
Language
This is a very well-written answer to the question! You have used simple and more advanced vocabulary and shown excellent control over grammatical structures, creating some very well-formed sentences.
Well done!
/\ Word(s) missing
- Omit word
C Capitalization
Gd Good
O Organisation
P Punctuation
PE Poorly expressed
R Register/Formality
SS Sentence Structure
S Spelling
T Tip (Not wrong but a suggestion)
WF Wrong form
WO Word order
WT Wrong tense
WW Wrong word