Check out students' answers to Flo-Joe's CAE Writing tasks with a teacher's feedback
A restaurant in your region is to open shortly and the owner has placed the following advertisement in your local newspaper:
|RESTAURANT STAFF NEEDED...
...For a busy restaurant located in the main tourist area of this region. We have a number of vacancies available, including:
Hours of work: 6 - 12pm, Mondays to Saturdays.
Please send us a letter explaining which post you are interested in and why we should consider you for the job. Interviews will be held a week after the closing date.
Write the letter of application (Between 220 and 260 words)
Read Olga's answer to this question below. Try correcting the piece of writing yourself first: use the marking codes to think about what might be wrong (or what's good) about the piece of work. Then when you're ready, click the green buttons in the text for our feedback.
Dear Sir or Madam
I am writing with reference to your advertisement for the position of a Restaurant Manager, which was placed in The Guardian on 10 December. Gd
My reason for being interested in this vacancy is that according to what is said by the executives of the companies I worked for (please find enclosed their letters of reference), I am particularly efficient /\
I am sure that I would be successful in this post as I have now gained the -
My academic background (a Masters Degree in Tourism & Hospitality) would also prove valuable to you.
Please could you send me an application form and any other relevant details including those of payment, WW
I am able to attend an interview on any day from 11 a. m. Should you need any further information, do not hesitate to contact me on 222333222 from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. or /\
This is a well-organised letter of application which shows good attention to achieving an appropriately formal register (e.g. 'I am writing with reference to...'; 'Should you need any further information...' etc). You include all of the necessary information for this type of letter.
For the makeover, there wasn't a great deal for me to correct. I have made a (small) number of suggestions that would make your letter sound very natural, but these are mostly quite minor quibbles!
/\ Word(s) missing
- Omit word
PE Poorly expressed
SS Sentence Structure
T Tip (Not wrong but a suggestion)
WF Wrong form
WO Word order
WT Wrong tense
WW Wrong word