Check out students' answers to Flo-Joe's FCE Writing tasks with a teacher's feedback
Question
You have seen the following advertisement in a magazine:
Film Weekly Top 100 films - the viewers choice
|
Write your article for Film Weekly magazine (around 140-190 words).
Read Barbara's answer to this question below. Try correcting the piece of writing yourself first: use the marking codes to think about what might be wrong (or what's good) about the piece of work. Then when you're ready, click the green buttons in the text for our feedback.
A Nightmare Do you want to be frightened at -It is the continuation to part 1, which ends WT In my opinion it is a movie, which you will never forget, because it is not like others. T "Blair Witch Projekt 2" is allowed for WW |
This is a nice answer, Barbara. You give a good description of the film and the type of person who would enjoy seeing it. However, this question is not simply a film review, but an article about excellent films. Therefore, you need to refer to your reason for writing the article (i.e. your nomination for favourite film) early on in the first paragraph and perhaps avoid addressing the reader as 'you', as you would do in a film review, but instead talk more objectively about 'the audience'.
In terms of language I have the following comments:
/\ Word(s) missing
- Omit word
C Capitalization
Gd Good
O Organisation
P Punctuation
PE Poorly expressed
R Register/Formality
SS Sentence Structure
S Spelling
T Tip
WF Wrong form
WO Word order
WT Wrong tense
WW Wrong word